Phoemeister: Sharks actually really freak me out, but I had to see Jaws for one of my other classes (one of the other semi-cool ones). And it was actually not so bad on account of how fakey the shark looked.
Phoemeister: A lot of things that I will never encounter ever in my life really freak me out, I've realized. Sharks, serial killers, killer bees...... and I don't even know why.
Kin: Heh. Well, they're just kind of freaky things.
Kin: I mean, who wants to get stung to death by a shit-load of bees? That would be the crappiest way to die ever.
Phoemeister: LOL..... yeah, that would be bad.
Phoemeister: They should make a horror movie about that.
Kin: I mean, getting stung once hurts enough to where it's not a pleasant experience at all. I can't imagine being stung enough times to die from it.
Phoemeister: Though actually I can see that more in a horror movie about something else, but the evil monster has the power to control bees or something. Like the scarab beetles in The Mummy.
Kin: It's been done. More than once, I think.
Kin: I don't remember what it's called, but there are a few horror movies about killer bees.
Phoemeister: Really? Well, yeah. I guess I never watch horror enough to know.
Phoemeister: I'm the hugest wuss. I don't really get scared in the theatre, but I always have nightmares after.
Phoemeister: I think there should be a horror movie about carnies.
Kin: Also been done.
Kin: ...A lot.
Kin: A lot, lot.
Phoemeister: Man. I'm horrible at this.
Phoemeister: I mean, I knew there were clown horror movies. But not carnie horror movies.
Kin: Pretty much everything you can think of has probably been done at some point.
Phoemeister: Probably.
Phoemeister: Mimes?
Kin: I'm sure. Haven't seen one, but I wouldn't doubt it.
Phoemeister: Is there a clown vs. carnies vs. mimes super-horror flick a la freddie vs Jason?
Kin: I dunno, but that would be kind cool.
Phoemeister: woo!
Phoemeister: Someday I'll write that screenplay.
Showing posts with label Brian. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Brian. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
solarcane
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Phoemeister: dude, my family's messed up.
Kin: Mine too.
Phoemeister: I just put some of this spray-antibiotic on my bellybutton (it's where one of my incisions is), and I was like wait a minute..... and looked at the expiration date, and it was November 1987
Kin: Whoa.
Phoemeister: I told my mom, and she wasn't surprised at all, and was like, "It still works."
Kin: Heh. Well, most medicines it doesn't really matter at all. They just put an expiration date on there because they're required to do so by law.
Kin: The spray part of that stuff might be effected after awhile though.
Phoemeister: Really? That eases my mind. My mom is always thrusting expired medication onto me, and I'm always convinced that someday something horrible is going to happen.
It sprays pretty well, I think. So that's good news for my belly button. I can't tell very well, but I think it might be oozing something.
Phoemeister: But it just might be the natural disgusting crap that kind of collects in belly buttons anyway
Kin: Heh. Could be.
Phoemeister: I figure better safe than sorry, though. I'm going to keep spraying myself with Solarcaine from 1987.
Phoemeister: dude, my family's messed up.
Kin: Mine too.
Phoemeister: I just put some of this spray-antibiotic on my bellybutton (it's where one of my incisions is), and I was like wait a minute..... and looked at the expiration date, and it was November 1987
Kin: Whoa.
Phoemeister: I told my mom, and she wasn't surprised at all, and was like, "It still works."
Kin: Heh. Well, most medicines it doesn't really matter at all. They just put an expiration date on there because they're required to do so by law.
Kin: The spray part of that stuff might be effected after awhile though.
Phoemeister: Really? That eases my mind. My mom is always thrusting expired medication onto me, and I'm always convinced that someday something horrible is going to happen.
It sprays pretty well, I think. So that's good news for my belly button. I can't tell very well, but I think it might be oozing something.
Phoemeister: But it just might be the natural disgusting crap that kind of collects in belly buttons anyway
Kin: Heh. Could be.
Phoemeister: I figure better safe than sorry, though. I'm going to keep spraying myself with Solarcaine from 1987.
slug sex
Phoemeister: Considering the next best thing I have to do is to talk to tina about whether or not a pair of slugs is having sex in this picture she took
Kin: Is it bad that that doesn't really surprise me?
Phoemeister: ......yes. Yes it is. But bad for me. That I'm the type of person that it doesn't surprise anyone that I'm sitting around IMing people about slug sex
Kin: Well, I was more talking about the fact that Tina took pictures of slugs having sex.
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: Tina would do that. And thanks for your faith in me.
Kin: Is it bad that that doesn't really surprise me?
Phoemeister: ......yes. Yes it is. But bad for me. That I'm the type of person that it doesn't surprise anyone that I'm sitting around IMing people about slug sex
Kin: Well, I was more talking about the fact that Tina took pictures of slugs having sex.
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: Tina would do that. And thanks for your faith in me.
sarcasm
Kin: And I'm hungry.
Phoemeister: Oh. You know, they have this new thing called eating. Could be the solution to all your problems.
Phoemeister: My nose hurts.
Phoemeister: Cause I ran into a shelf
Phoemeister: good times
Kin: Ow...Well...They also have this thing called not running into shelves. =P
Phoemeister: Yeah. I just heard about it. I was all, "Man, I wish I had known about that
Phoemeister: Oh. You know, they have this new thing called eating. Could be the solution to all your problems.
Phoemeister: My nose hurts.
Phoemeister: Cause I ran into a shelf
Phoemeister: good times
Kin: Ow...Well...They also have this thing called not running into shelves. =P
Phoemeister: Yeah. I just heard about it. I was all, "Man, I wish I had known about that
cylinders
Phoemeister: I can't wait until this semester's over and I'm graduated.
Phoemeister: Me and cylinders will have a lot more in common.
Kin: Oh-ho.
Phoemeister: You are the only one I'd risk that joke with. Because most people I know wouldn't get it. And the rest would scorn me like the crappy punmaker I am.
Kin: At first I was like, "What do car engines have to do with this?...Would she be driving more? Ooooh. Graduated cylinders."
Kin: I mean, that whole thing lasted probably less than a second, but that was the general thought process that went on there.
Phoemeister: lol.... it's alright. If you made that joke, I wouldn't get it at all. I mean, I know what a graduated cylinder is (obviously, I made that joke) but my brain just isn't flexible. I'd think "What? You're going to be round? With flat sides? Your volume will be PI R squared times your height? What?"
Kin: I wish I were a cylinder. Then I could roll places.
Phoemeister: That would be nice. Only if I rolled places, I'd want to be a non-bruisable cylinder. Because I think you could hurt yourself otherwise.
Kin: True. And you'd be a pretty squishy cylinder at that.
Phoemeister: Squishy Cylinder should be a band name.
Phoemeister: Or a kid's fruit snack.
Kin: Yes it should.
Kin: Mm...I don't know about that one.
Phoemeister: Really?
Phoemeister: I could see that.
Phoemeister: But maybe it's best if it stays a band.
Kin: Well, I can see fruit snacks being squishy cylinders, because they generally are. Or squishy...whatevers. But not being named that. Because it doesn't sound very appetizing.
Phoemeister: Hmm. You do have a point. I guess I was caught up in the being, not the name appeal.
Kin: "The Squishy Cylinders That Eat Like A Meal."
Phoemeister: Me and cylinders will have a lot more in common.
Kin: Oh-ho.
Phoemeister: You are the only one I'd risk that joke with. Because most people I know wouldn't get it. And the rest would scorn me like the crappy punmaker I am.
Kin: At first I was like, "What do car engines have to do with this?...Would she be driving more? Ooooh. Graduated cylinders."
Kin: I mean, that whole thing lasted probably less than a second, but that was the general thought process that went on there.
Phoemeister: lol.... it's alright. If you made that joke, I wouldn't get it at all. I mean, I know what a graduated cylinder is (obviously, I made that joke) but my brain just isn't flexible. I'd think "What? You're going to be round? With flat sides? Your volume will be PI R squared times your height? What?"
Kin: I wish I were a cylinder. Then I could roll places.
Phoemeister: That would be nice. Only if I rolled places, I'd want to be a non-bruisable cylinder. Because I think you could hurt yourself otherwise.
Kin: True. And you'd be a pretty squishy cylinder at that.
Phoemeister: Squishy Cylinder should be a band name.
Phoemeister: Or a kid's fruit snack.
Kin: Yes it should.
Kin: Mm...I don't know about that one.
Phoemeister: Really?
Phoemeister: I could see that.
Phoemeister: But maybe it's best if it stays a band.
Kin: Well, I can see fruit snacks being squishy cylinders, because they generally are. Or squishy...whatevers. But not being named that. Because it doesn't sound very appetizing.
Phoemeister: Hmm. You do have a point. I guess I was caught up in the being, not the name appeal.
Kin: "The Squishy Cylinders That Eat Like A Meal."
bastard
Phoemeister: oooh. Bookstores are cool. At least I imagine working at one would be nice. If you get a discount on merch.
Phoemeister: Plus, people who read are generally more educated, and hence slightly less obnoxious than the general public
Phoemeister: when you deal with them
Kin: Hopefully.
Phoemeister: true
Phoemeister: I was pretty much talking out my ass right then
Phoemeister: I've never worked in a bookstore
Kin: lol...That's okay.
Kin: They say the same thing about musicians, but it just isn't true. Sure, most are pretty cool, but man...There are some who are just annoying as hell.
Kin: And stupid, to boot.
Phoemeister: hunh.
Phoemeister: that's too bad.
Phoemeister: I guess there's no sure way to decide that people aren't bastards before you meet them
Kin: Yep. There's really not. Unless there was some sort of activity that only bastards could partake in.
Phoemeister: true. Like.... bastard three legged races, or bastard eating contests.
Kin: Or only non-bastards for that matter. But then, if there were something that only bastards could do, someone could arrange for there to be an "accident" during it, and then the world would be a little less bastardful.
Kin: Mm....Bastard eating contests. I love me a nice, juicy bastard.
Phoemeister: Plus, people who read are generally more educated, and hence slightly less obnoxious than the general public
Phoemeister: when you deal with them
Kin: Hopefully.
Phoemeister: true
Phoemeister: I was pretty much talking out my ass right then
Phoemeister: I've never worked in a bookstore
Kin: lol...That's okay.
Kin: They say the same thing about musicians, but it just isn't true. Sure, most are pretty cool, but man...There are some who are just annoying as hell.
Kin: And stupid, to boot.
Phoemeister: hunh.
Phoemeister: that's too bad.
Phoemeister: I guess there's no sure way to decide that people aren't bastards before you meet them
Kin: Yep. There's really not. Unless there was some sort of activity that only bastards could partake in.
Phoemeister: true. Like.... bastard three legged races, or bastard eating contests.
Kin: Or only non-bastards for that matter. But then, if there were something that only bastards could do, someone could arrange for there to be an "accident" during it, and then the world would be a little less bastardful.
Kin: Mm....Bastard eating contests. I love me a nice, juicy bastard.
ass
Phoemeister: I bet you've had a better day than I did
Phoemeister: I was totally mooned by teenage boys today.
Kin: Well, my day's really not been that bad.
Kin: And why is that?
Phoemeister: I guess newsvan just screams "moon me"
Phoemeister: eh, that wasn't really the worst part of my day
Phoemeister: but I thought it was funny
Phoemeister: the other stuff I won't really go into
Phoemeister: because it involves an intricate web of office politics
Phoemeister: whearas "naked teenage boy ass" sort of speaks for itself
Kin: Okay.
Phoemeister: I was totally mooned by teenage boys today.
Kin: Well, my day's really not been that bad.
Kin: And why is that?
Phoemeister: I guess newsvan just screams "moon me"
Phoemeister: eh, that wasn't really the worst part of my day
Phoemeister: but I thought it was funny
Phoemeister: the other stuff I won't really go into
Phoemeister: because it involves an intricate web of office politics
Phoemeister: whearas "naked teenage boy ass" sort of speaks for itself
Kin: Okay.
lion king
Kin: I don't hate you too much more than usual.
Phoemeister: okay
Phoemeister: as long as we're at a manageable level of hate
Phoemeister: Hulk smash hate is okay
Phoemeister: carve you up into little pieces with an axe hate is bad
Kin: Well, you've know about my axe-murdering tendencies for years now, Phoe. Come on. I would think you would've just learned not to piss me off by now.
Phoemeister: you would've thought that, but actually I provoke axe murderers every day. I find it a much more easy way to live on the edge than to pay people to jump out of plains
Kin: That's pretty hardcore though. I can't even imagine how one jumps out of a plain. =P
Phoemeister: haha
Phoemeister: well first off you wait until the rain in spain is done, because you don't want that shit going down while you're trying to do that
Phoemeister: and then you get rid of all the fruit, if it's a fruited plain
Phoemeister: and then you just pray to god it all turns out alright
Kin: Sorry, I was on the phone.
Phoemeister: that's okay
Phoemeister: I was jumping out of plains
Kin: Was it everything you dreamed it'd be?
Phoemeister: and more!
Phoemeister: how was the phone?
Kin: It was great. So many little buttons...
Phoemeister: did they beep when you pushed them?
Kin: No, because I turned the sound off. But the phone lights up when I press a button.
Phoemeister: that's still pretty cool
Phoemeister: plants survive on light
Phoemeister: so just think: your phone makes food for plants
Phoemeister: plants make food for humans
Phoemeister: it's the circle of life
Kin: Phones...Plants.
Kin: It's just like the Lion King.
Phoemeister: I think I'm going to burst into song
Phoemeister: okay
Phoemeister: as long as we're at a manageable level of hate
Phoemeister: Hulk smash hate is okay
Phoemeister: carve you up into little pieces with an axe hate is bad
Kin: Well, you've know about my axe-murdering tendencies for years now, Phoe. Come on. I would think you would've just learned not to piss me off by now.
Phoemeister: you would've thought that, but actually I provoke axe murderers every day. I find it a much more easy way to live on the edge than to pay people to jump out of plains
Kin: That's pretty hardcore though. I can't even imagine how one jumps out of a plain. =P
Phoemeister: haha
Phoemeister: well first off you wait until the rain in spain is done, because you don't want that shit going down while you're trying to do that
Phoemeister: and then you get rid of all the fruit, if it's a fruited plain
Phoemeister: and then you just pray to god it all turns out alright
Kin: Sorry, I was on the phone.
Phoemeister: that's okay
Phoemeister: I was jumping out of plains
Kin: Was it everything you dreamed it'd be?
Phoemeister: and more!
Phoemeister: how was the phone?
Kin: It was great. So many little buttons...
Phoemeister: did they beep when you pushed them?
Kin: No, because I turned the sound off. But the phone lights up when I press a button.
Phoemeister: that's still pretty cool
Phoemeister: plants survive on light
Phoemeister: so just think: your phone makes food for plants
Phoemeister: plants make food for humans
Phoemeister: it's the circle of life
Kin: Phones...Plants.
Kin: It's just like the Lion King.
Phoemeister: I think I'm going to burst into song
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