the scrotee

Phoemeister: I love the limey. I have to buy it sometime.
Suibrom: yeah.. great movie
Suibrom: like i said, last time i showed it to people, they were very confused
Phoemeister: oh my gosh. The shirt i'm wearing has the same year on it as the year the limey was made. Is this fate?
Phoemeister: people are stupid
Suibrom: like.. "what the hell is this? i thought you said it was funny?"
Phoemeister: people can't follow anything that's strictly linear, and that's very sad
Phoemeister: it IS funny. In a sad way. At parts.
Phoemeister: that ISN'T strictly linear, I mean
Phoemeister: DUDE
Phoemeister: He was in School of Rock! I totally can't remember him in that.
Phoemeister: http://imdb.com/name/nm0441588/
Suibrom: haha yeah
Phoemeister: I've seen him in the boiler room and didn't remember either. but I saw that a looong time ago
Suibrom: yeah
Phoemeister: Yeah. I like whats his name
Phoemeister: the guy with the italian name
Suibrom: hehe
Phoemeister: Giovanni something
Suibrom: yeah
Suibrom: he's good
Phoemeister: Yeah
Phoemeister: Ribisi
Suibrom: yeah that guy
Phoemeister: he's cool
Phoemeister: I wonder if he's a little off though
Phoemeister: because he's good at playing people that are a little off
Suibrom: he seem that way doesn't he
Suibrom: yeah
Phoemeister: And his face looks funny
Phoemeister: I'd still have sex with him though
Suibrom: haha
Phoemeister: true story.
Suibrom: ow ow!
Suibrom: see.
Suibrom: broadband = porn.
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: porn's no good
Phoemeister: I need to find me a man
Phoemeister: preferably Giovanni Ribisi
Suibrom: hahah
Phoemeister: LOL
Suibrom: i will find a man named giovanni ribisi
Suibrom: and send him to your door
Phoemeister: sweeeet
Suibrom: we have a lot of italians working at our terminals
Phoemeister: Unless he's totally abusive or ugly
Phoemeister: LOL
Suibrom: i bet there's someoen with a name like that
Phoemeister: Why didn't you tell me? Big burly dockworkers AND italians.......score!
Suibrom: "hey.. giovanni.. you know how you make like.. 50 bucks an hour tying up ships? want to make 100/hr tying up a hot college girl?"
Phoemeister: whoa.
Phoemeister: who said I had that kind of money?
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: i'll find a way to make the company pay for it
Suibrom: remember, i take care of the payroll! : )
Phoemeister: sweeet! You are the best.
Phoemeister: LOL
Suibrom: Marine Terminal Corporation, and Call Service.
Phoemeister: ah
Phoemeister: I totally gots to go out there and scope out the guys
Phoemeister: I'm not up for any sad looking guys with goatees though, so don't get your hopes up.
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: damn
Suibrom: that's okay.. i wouldn't want to break giovanni's heart ; )
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: Good
Suibrom: becuase he'd break my kneecaps
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: really? Is he violent? I might not want to get involved with him if he's busting kneecaps regularly
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: well he is italian
Suibrom: and he is "a little off"
Suibrom: as you put it
Suibrom: i guess that depends what you mean by "regularly"
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: Maybe I should find another guy
Phoemeister: I should go after Stacy the Hitman
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: hotstuff!
Phoemeister: I don't remember him being hot, but I don't remember him being ugly either. That's pretty much enough for me :P
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: as long as he's not the elephant man
Suibrom: except where it counts!
Phoemeister: yeah :P

Phoemeister: ROFLMAO
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: oh, and i meant his heart.. by the way
Suibrom: you pervert ; )
Phoemeister: My new motto. "As long as he's not the elephant man....... except where it counts."
Suibrom: hahah
Phoemeister: LOL.... you did NOT mean heart, you bigger perv
Suibrom: haha.. okay.. maybe i didn't
Suibrom: but i have to try and save face some how
Suibrom: and in regards to me being a bigger perv.. just remember size doesn't matter
Suibrom: it's like a haiku i wrote long ago
Suibrom:
it is not the size
nor is it how you use it.
it is just the taste.
Phoemeister: LOL.... you are a perv. IBPW
Suibrom: hha
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: oh, of course
Suibrom: the best possible way ; )
Phoemeister: I was about to be like, I know that haiku!

I may not be soup
I may not be from a store
but I love you.

or somesuch
Suibrom: hahah
Phoemeister: I loved that haiku
Suibrom: I may not be soup.
I may not come from a store.
But I do love you.
Suibrom: heheh
Phoemeister: Ah
Phoemeister: Yeah. That is stone cold awesome
Suibrom: what a coincidence.. that's my name
Phoemeister: Stone Cold Awesome?
Suibrom: yup!
Suibrom: stone cold steve awesome
Phoemeister: Stone Cold Steve WICKED Awesome
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: stone cold steve super wicked badasstical awesome
Suibrom: that's my whole name
Suibrom: in my native tongue
Phoemeister: NICE
Suibrom: oh, indeed it is
Phoemeister: I especially love Badasstastical!
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: that's from my mother's side
Phoemeister: ROFLMAO
Phoemeister: The Newport Badassticals?
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: exactly
Phoemeister: I've heard there's a lot of alcoholism in the badasstastical family. You shouldn't hit the sauce too hard in case you are too.
Suibrom: haha
Phoemeister: ...... I wish I were badasstastical. I guess I'll have to settle for being a magnificent bastard.
Suibrom: yeah.. i've got it bad from both the "Sacramento Super Wicked's" on my dad's sid.. and the newport badassticals on my mom's side
Suibrom: they're all lushes!
Phoemeister: ROFLMAO
Suibrom: so i stay far away from the juice
Phoemeister: good idea
Suibrom: far like.. at least..arm's length
Phoemeister: :P
Suibrom: because leaning a little bit is hard
Phoemeister: you dork
Phoemeister: ibpw
Suibrom: especially when you're the elephant man...

where it counts!
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: *takes a bow* indeed.
Phoemeister: THe heart
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: exactly
Suibrom: my heart is so elephantine
Suibrom: that it sometimes seeps into other parts of my body
Phoemeister: Like your sad goatee?
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: yes
Suibrom: does that mean it doesn't get your vote? hehe
Phoemeister: Aw, I've got nothing against the goatee
Phoemeister: I don't have to look at it regularly :P
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: oh snap
Suibrom: no you di'int
Phoemeister: oh yes I diiii iiiid
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: daaaaym girl
Phoemeister: :P
Suibrom: oh, i'd just like to inform you that i've saved your highschool picture that you sent, for possible future blackmailing
Phoemeister: Psh. Can't blackmail me with that. I look better there than I do now
Suibrom: haha
Phoemeister: I've gained weight and gotten all tired
Suibrom: well damn.. maybe i can use it later to pretend i've kidnapped your daughter
Phoemeister: I don't plan on having kids. But I guess you could pretend to capture me and clone me against my will
Suibrom: mm.. good idea
Suibrom: would you be offended if some day in the future i said i had cloned you and forced your clone to be my unwilling sex slave?
Suibrom: and more importantly, would you be willing to give me a ransom to set said hypothetical clone free?
Phoemeister: part 1) Yes, as long as the "unwilling" part is in there

part 2) if the ransom is a pizza coupon, yes. I'm not willing to go much higher for my imaginary clone.
Suibrom: hmm
Suibrom: pizza is tasty..
Suibrom: can we pretend i've already done this, and have you send me a pizza coupon?
Phoemeister: Suuuure
Suibrom: score!
Suibrom: i'll just make you buy me a slice of pizza next time i'm in IL
Phoemeister: k
Phoemeister: So.... like, forty years from now?
Suibrom: or rather.. ask politely if you would be so kind to buy me a slice of pizza in return for your imaginary clone
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: who knows..
Suibrom: i was there last year.. but someone was too good to come hang out in chicago with me
Phoemeister: Someone doesn't have an excuse to go to chicago to tell the parents
Suibrom: if it bothers you that much.. i'll either A) shave the goatee, B)shave the scrotee, or C)somehow fashion it into a happy goatee
Phoemeister: ROFLMAO
Phoemeister: I don't even want to know about the scrotee......
Suibrom: hahah
Phoemeister: I bet it somehow connects to Scrappy Doo. "You don't have the scrot, man!"
Suibrom: well i figured if i shaved that, you'd be too busy being distracted to notice the "sad goatee"
Suibrom: hahaha
Suibrom: i picture shaggy's sad little goatee in that movie in regards to that referrence
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: LOL
Suibrom: only, well.. placed elsewhere
Phoemeister: I was mentioning the conversation we had where I mentioned that scrappy doo said someone didn't have the scrot to do something
Phoemeister: LOL
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: what did that person say about the conversation?
Phoemeister: I was talking to you, mr. sad scrotee
Suibrom: ooooh i thought you mean you told someone else about the conversation
Suibrom: and i'll have you know.. my scrotee is far from sad
Suibrom: usually
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: I like "usually"
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: i bet you do ; )
Phoemeister: "Once and awhile the scrotee gets the blues."
Phoemeister: :P
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: so to speak
Phoemeister: Which, I'm thinking is a euphemism meaning that you are impotent :P
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: impoRtent
Suibrom: there's an "R" in there.. get it right
Phoemeister: :P
Suibrom: haha.. haven't you heard the term 'blue balls' ?
Phoemeister: doesn't that just mean you're not getting any?
Suibrom: haha yeah
Suibrom: so that would be more appropriate for when "my scrotee has the blues"
Phoemeister: No. I think you can't get it up, and the scrotee feels sorry for you.
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: that's one of those things that i can't really say "oh yeah! well i'll show you!"
Phoemeister: Thanks for not showing me
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: you're welcome
Suibrom: i wouldn't want you to get the blues too
Phoemeister: Yeah. The Scrotee Blues (which, btw, would make a great song title) are highly contagious
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: "The Scrotee Blues" by Harold Johnson
Phoemeister: who's harold johnson?
Suibrom: i dunno.. harry johnson sounded like a good name to sing the scrotee blues
Phoemeister: well I get the johnson bit
Phoemeister: but my grandpa's name is harold
Suibrom: haha.. hmm
Suibrom: his last name isn't johnson is it?
Phoemeister: No
Suibrom: okay..
Suibrom: hmm
Phoemeister: Dick Johnson?
Suibrom: oh i was going to ask.. does that mean women can get teh scrotee blues too?
Phoemeister: I dunno. I've really never thought about it before :P
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: well you said it was highly contagious
Phoemeister: Yeah. But women can be carriers. Men don't get yeast infections, but they can carry them and give them to women. Which, I'm sure you wanted to know that :P
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: that's actually quite interesting
Suibrom: i didn't know that
Phoemeister: They told us in health class
Phoemeister: Ah, health class. Don't you miss discussing drugs and STD's?
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: miss it? it's a part of my everyday life
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: I'm sure
Suibrom: i made up, or heard, or something a really good quote a while back
Phoemeister: I guess technically we did just discuss an STD. 2 if you count the scrotee blues
Phoemeister: LOL........and it is....?
Suibrom: something like.. "life is just a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% mortality rate."
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: that's great
Suibrom: yeah i thought so
Phoemeister: You know those ads where the kid sings about having the "blue box" blues? It's about kraft macaroni and cheese?

We could easily steal that song and take blue box and say scrotee and then it'd be like, "I got the scrotee blues."
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: should we really have kids singing it though?
Phoemeister: No. I didn't say to have a kid singing it. I was saying that's the origin of the song.
Suibrom: hehe okay, just making sure
Suibrom: maybe your'e into that ; )
Phoemeister: though, if the kid was going through puberty, he could have the blues about how his scrotee is growing in
Phoemeister: No
Phoemeister: I'm into italian guys and burly dockworkers
Suibrom: haha that is true
Suibrom: haha
Suibrom: who like to tie things up?
Phoemeister: Actually, you were the one that brought tieng things up into the equation. I didn't argue because I thought it would be more funny to be like "whoa!" like I'm about to argue and then turn the tables and argue about the price
Suibrom: haha, all right..well when i talk to giovanni, i'll have to make sure he understands that the tying up stays on the docks
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: or the dude from the Limey
Phoemeister: who's only a;n elephant man where it counts
Suibrom: hahah
Suibrom: exactly