hulk smash diet

Me: OH today I saw this book at borders called the fat smash diet
Me: and I was like, "I want a sequel called the hulk smash diet"
Me: and you lose all the weight because you are busy breaking things because you are angry
Ryan: haha
Ryan: that's a good diet
Me: and all the after pictures are all these thin green people
Me: oh and also if you don't have enough anger you can take steroids
Me: then you're ripped AND extra angry
Ryan: I need to get on this diet
Me: haha you're already skinny
Me: I'm th eone who needs to diet :/
Ryan: start smashing things
Me: I have been gaining weight when I moved out because I do the grocery shopping now and there's always stuff I like to eat in my fridge
Me: haha
Ryan: I could smash things for you
Me: and my parents buy me candy to show their love
Me: would that work?
Ryan: we can see!
Ryan: I'll get on that, because I could do with some good smashing
Me: wouldn't it be awesome if you could get people to work out and it made you thinner?
Me: I bet only rich people would do it though
Ryan: haha
Me: although if the hulk smash diet really did work it sounds like you would be more than happy to do the smashing for me
Ryan: this is very true
Ryan: I'm all about destroying things
Ryan: especially in the name of good
Me: haha when I was demonstrating this idea to one of my coworkers I really wanted to rip up a book and throw it on the ground
Me: but I knew I'd have to pay for it
Me: so I ripped up one of our coupons
Ryan: you should have totally done it hulk hogan style and ripped your own shirt off
Me: haha I think that constitutes sexual harassment
Me: although there was this one coworker of mine today who spilled something on himself and was like, "Should I take the shirt off?" and I was like, "yeah, take it ALL off"
Ryan: haha
Me: and then started singing my best approximation of cheezy stripper music
Me: yeah I think I've sexually harassed nearly all of my coworkers both male and female
Ryan: and I'm sure they love it
Me: oh yeah

Me: because I like Ryan
Ryan: Meh, Ryan's overrated
Me: shut the fuck up, Ryan is totally cool
Me: You always make fun of what I like
Ryan: haha I am so cool.. I mock everything you love : P

Me: so do you think there's something wrong with my "network card"?
Ryan: haha no it might just be a network glitch
Ryan: and resetting the card might fix it
Ryan: or maybe the interwebs are down
Ryan: and you did it